All these cases in the media lately seem to have come up out of nowhere though I`m sure teens have been committing suicide for a long time over their sexuality. I guess if this kind of thing happened 20 years ago, it was just another random teen suicide and it wasn`t such a public sort of event.
When any teen commits suicide it`s heartbreaking, though, simply because the way one feels and experiences one has as a teen are not permanent and in no way a reflection of one`s future life. To give up so early and so easily is tragic.
I do wonder if it`s quite as cut and dry as it`s being portrayed: is it really a matter of cause & effect? I mean thousands,maybe millions of kids are bullied and they don't commit suicide. That's not to say we shouldn't do what we can to stop bullying and homophobia, of course, but mainly because it's just damaging period, whether or not the victim ends up committing suicide. But I think that these kids who kill themselves at such a young age must have more going on their lives. The kid who was taped in his dorm room with another guy perhaps was a bit different because it was such a public humiliation. But what makes someone like that think that dying is better than living?
I guess I have never really been suicidal or severely depressed so I can't really imagine what goes through someone's mind at a time like that. But being bullied doesn't "cause" suicide. I get uncomfortable with the idea that student A who picks on or bullies or even treats student B terribly somehow "caused" student B to kill himself. It's just not that simple.
It's like this friend of mine who talks bad about another mutual friend. Apparently this guy had a girlfriend several years ago who he 'drove to suicide' (she attempted suicide and ended up in a mental hospital where, as far as I know, she still is to this day) and I get irritated at this accusation. Doesn't someone have the power to walk away from an emotionally abusive relationship? Isn't someone ultimately responsible for their own actions? Isn't suicide often a result of depression or other mental illness? I mean, don't get me wrong, the guy is a jerk and women should stay away from him. But the kind of person who stays with a guy like him and puts up with his abuse has more problems than that. I don't know. I just don't like these simple answers for such complex sets of behavior.
The kids who taped that kid in New Jersey in his dorm room should be punished, certainly. What they did was cruel and unforgivable. But they certainly couldn't have known that he was so close to the edge. Or that it would end this way. And they must feel terrible. Was it a "hate crime"? That makes me even more uncomfortable. If it had been a girl taped having sex with a guy and she'd gone out and killed herself, we'd say that was terrible and it was a terrible prank gone awry, but a hate crime? I don't think so...I clearly don't know all the details but I blame is tricky and, again, it's not just a matter of saying A caused B to kill himself.
